Jill and Sandra are two women who support others in a positive and mindful way.
Thanks you ladies and to my readers: Please look for the good things in others and stop there without adding the BUT….Dr Pia
Occasionally I have guests who bring relevant topics up for discussion.  I love Sandra’s perspective on this subject and I think its sadly a big part of daily life for woman. I hope you appreciate her message.  Jill Thomas
As a woman you may feel you are completely supportive of women’s equality and you might even remember the Women’s Movement of the 70s and 80s which brought broad and far reaching changes to our culture. However, there are still disturbing remnants of discrimination, and the worst seems to come from women ourselves.
Play a little game with me. Take notice of every time you think or talk about another woman. Is it supportive or is there a little (or big) undercurrent of criticism? If you are like me, you may find there is some less-than-supportive or unfair element in your thoughts or conversation. Take this game one step further, does this help or hurt us as women? You may recognize that when you speak or think positively of another woman, that you take some part of it away. For example, you may admire a woman in public life such as former Attorney General Madeleine Albright, but also comment on her age or her lack of physical beauty. You might think Hilary Clinton has done a great job as Secretary of State, but also call attention to how non-stop travel has impacted her looks. Would you make such comments about men of comparable achievement? Of course not. How about demeaning the accomplishments of other women by noting that they have failed (in your opinion) in some other feminine arena? Perhaps, you comment on the successful business woman whose children did not turn out so well.
Real change begins with us. In order to feel better about ourselves and our accomplishments, we need to take real pleasure in the success of other women and stop seeing it as a threat. Competition divides us, whereas support of one another will enhance us all.
Sandra Rogers, LMFT, is a psychotherapist in private practice in Encinitas, and runs workshops for women based on the Goddess Archetypes